24 June 2010

two gentlemen enjoy a footie match

Since the foggy monocle is out of business apparently, here's what happens when two gentlemen are forced to watch the all too pivotal third group stage match at work. WARNING - pants will be ruined:

5th minute

Rob Gordon: chippy start
Celluloid Hero: jesus just finish this shit
and fucking bornstein?!
Rob Gordon:yeah dude, positive thinking, positive thinking...
Celluloid Hero: i'm trying to remain calm
Rob Gordon: yeah, we shall prevail
12th minute
Celluloid Hero: listened to metallica's "don't tread on me" on the way in! im pumped!
thats right yellow card!
Rob Gordon: #19 for algeria is swole the fuck up!

Celluloid Hero: he looks like the original bruno
20th minute
Rob Gordon: the deuce!
how did gomez miss that?
22nd minute
Rob Gordon: deuce!!!!
we get fucked again
Celluloid Hero: offsides?
fuck england scored.
Rob Gordon: was it wazza?
Celluloid Hero: another botched call by the refs
31st minute
Celluloid Hero: what the fuck dude. this is pathetic.
Rob Gordon: we're a second half team - keep the faith
plus i've got jozy scoring in about 3 minutes
Celluloid Hero: haha
nice moves by Stevie C!
34th minute
Rob Gordon: yessir
we'll get one don't worry
bocanegra is so dreamy
Rob Gordon:
dempsey great chance
poor finish Celluloid Hero: i have the sound all the way up on my phone!
Rob Gordon: haha
35th minute
Rob Gordon: that would have been jozy in the 35th!
open fucking net
Celluloid Hero: fucking fred sub in?
Rob Gordon: haha
45th minute
Rob Gordon: our first touches have been awful
Half Time
Rob Gordon: does bradley make half time changes?
dempsey at striker?
feildhaber for obama?
let's hope this pays off
46th minute
Celluloid Hero: fuck i'm stressing out
Rob Gordon: never, ever thought i'd type this:
but I would have liked to have seen buddle in the first half
Celluloid Hero: oh definitely. he and jozy play well together.
49th minute
Rob Gordon: donovan needs to get involved
we play best when he's going box to box
Celluloid Hero: who doesnt like going box to box?
Rob Gordon: haha
unless it's at an atlantic city strip club apparently
Celluloid Hero: oh god that was foul
im just sticking to vegas strip clubs or none at all.
56th minute
Celluloid Hero: W-T-F
Rob Gordon: ughh
landon hasn't been involved in the match at all
64th minute
Celluloid Hero: about time buddle comes on
67th minute Rob Gordon: mother fucker!!!!!
71st minute
Celluloid Hero: lil joe cole in for rooney
74th minute
Rob Gordon: how many sitters can we blow?
75th minute
Celluloid Hero: now i'm just hoping for slovenia to go level.
82nd minute
Celluloid Hero: love how the ref misses the elbow to deuce
91st minute
Rob Gordon: i just came!!!
Celluloid Hero: holy fucking shit dude
Rob Gordon: group winners!
Celluloid Hero: saturday. 2:30
Rob Gordon: holy shit man!
talk about a nail biter
Celluloid Hero: holy fuck, i need a lucky strike right about now.
Rob Gordon: i need to go jerk off
Celluloid Hero: i need to celebrate tonight!
Rob Gordon: i want to start a damn riot!
Celluloid Hero: hmm..let me look up the algerian embassy
Rob Gordon: haha
wow, man - that was the longest 91 minutes ever
Celluloid Hero: its in adams morgan. actually right down the street from cypress hill
Rob Gordon: holy shit dude
these nips could cut a diamond right now
Celluloid Hero: yeah dude. i was about to put a noose around my neck and produce some ejaculate
great day. emotional day. i wonder what Robert Evans would think


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